Today in Foundations Class at church we delved into the second week of an overview of the book Prodigal God: Recovering the Heart of the Christian Faith by Timothy Keller - if you haven't read the book I definitely recommend it. It's been about two months since I read the book, but as we went through the topic of the eldest son I slowly began to remember the convicting messages of entitlement, selfishness and selfish motivations, pride, and self righteousness. I am such an elder brother. I can't really think of a time when I've done something only to selflessly benefit another. I always see the angle at how it could make me look good, gain favor, please this person, etc. I constantly have to battle to check what makes me do the things I do, and whether I'm striving to please God or to look good.
So back to the class. As I sat there listening to others talk about performance and the importance the Eldest Brother ascribes to it, it hit me that the reason the Eldest Son does so is that he himself is a performer. Everything he does is to keep the facade of righteousness - the illusion that he doesn't need God - intact. Instead of sinning through commission he sins through omission. And he does all the right things, but if you were to look at the reasons or heart behind the actions you would see a different truth. The truth that the Eldest brother is just as selfish as the Youngest, but cares about looking good - He's a people pleaser of sorts. This is me. Or me without God.
Thankfully I have God, who just like the father in the story puts up with my embarrassing pride, patiently waits for my repentance, and tenderly offers me his loving arms when I do. I have a truly prodigal God.
"But he was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him,"
- Luke 15:28 (ESV)
- Luke 15:28 (ESV)
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